Friday, April 2

leaving my marks

funny how what works one day...
isn't necessarily best for the next.

as you can see,
I put aside my little drawing journal,
and picked up my mandala journal.

I've had a series of really rough days.
Chemo kicks butt, or should I say guts,
but during pauses I lay in bed with my pen and mandala journal, leaving my marks,
until they all came together to form something I'm quite pleased with.

click on images for closer view

I just cannot express how blessed I feel
with having this community of support behind me,
rallying away! I feel your love, support,
and encouragement and love you all for it.

My heart spills over with gratitude.

33 comments:

  1. Hi Karin. Sorry you are not feeling well and having a rough time. Your journal is awesome. I love it! I'm going to click on it to view it better. Thanks for sharing. Happy Easter! Take care.

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  2. And beautiful, fascinating stuff it is...and I'm sure there's nothing better for you at this (or perhaps any) time that to try to keep your creativity going...wishing you the best...

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  3. so beautifull mandala journal! great post, happy easter

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  4. Oh Karin, I kind of felt that you are having a hard time. Don´t ask me how and why, it was just a feeling.

    But I´m applauding you for mastering so brave another round of the chemo. Another step forward that brings you closer to the day you can leave this chapter behind you and I´ll keep on crossing my fingers that the chemo chapter passes by as quick as possible and with less discomfort as possible.

    We can only send uplifting words and I´m glad to hear this gives you support.

    "Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

    ~ Marcel Proust

    And you know - healing vibes from me are on their way to you, always.

    Wishing you and John peaceful easter holidays.

    Lots of love xoxo Bettina

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  5. this is beautiful, karin... just beautiful... xo

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  6. Karin, your beauty knows no bounds. Such intricate, meticulous work surely must focus and ease you ... I'm sending huge love and hoping that all's coming back together with your home (snowstorm impacts and such) ... I hope you can enjoy a wee treat of Easter chocolate ... xoxooxoxoxxooxxoxo

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  7. This is so beautiful.

    I'm sorry you have had a rough few days.

    Hope you have a lovely weekend...

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  8. This mandala and the detail shots please my eye immensely. Stunning!
    It amazes me that you create such beauty when you are feeling so awful. Hang in there my friend. Sending love.

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  9. Hi Karin, Thanks for calling by my blog. I'm so sorry you've been having a rough time - you've been in my thoughts. I love the marks you have been making - they are so open and delicate. I hope that you are taking great care of yourself.
    Pen x

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  10. lots of love and moral support coming your way karin . . . awesome detailed work, it constantly amazes me. Wish I had a tenth of your patience! Keep on truckin' baby!!

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  11. your new mandala is lovely! please feel better! lyle

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  12. lover-lee. your work is a blessing to behold

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  13. yes you should be pleased! it is amazing and out of suffering comes such beauty. you are a most powerful transformer my dear friend! xoxox

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  14. You are incredible! How you can even eek out anything from your pen amazes me - what's more is your attitude! You are special stuff- indeed you are! You work always wows me.

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  15. I had a real visceral reaction to this piece, as I often do with your work. But this one, brought lots of emotion with it (even before I read you'd been having a rough time with the chemo).

    I don't know what your intention is when you do these, Karin, or if there even is an intention. And, I know that you call your writing something different, but I still like to think of it as the Language of Light.

    This one feels so healing to me. And, it's bigger than just you or your cancer. It's for all of us. For humanity.

    I feel so very blessed by this piece. Thank you.

    Surrounding you in healing Light and Love...

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  16. Your Mandala's are beautiful. What is the language in the background? I find foreign alphabets mesmorising.

    I hope all starts feeling etter soon. I have heard eating a raw russel sprout each morning is very good at fending off cancer.

    You take care xxJ

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  17. Hey K
    This piece is so beautiful.. out of the wretched comes the glorious...funny how that works.

    When I was little and feeling ill, which happened a lot, my mom would put me to bed and bring me my sketchbook and 2 white mice. The mice would cavort about on the deep green wool blanket as I drew imaginary worlds.
    Your drawing reminds me of those very healing times....so thanks!

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  18. Karin I love the way you always make the most of each moment...can't get out of bed to paint? so write and doodle in pen in bed. As grateful as you feel for the community of support and love you feel...I can only speak for myself, but I feel the same way when you and so many others drop by my blog too...this is a unique moment in human history when people from all over the world can reach out to each other and wish each other well from the depths of our hearts.

    You are a remarkable woman, I am so grateful to have met you here online. May you feel safe, loved, contented in this moment.
    xo

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  19. Beautiful !!!
    ... and you always leave your marks in my heart with your art :)

    Hope the rought days will pass soon.

    .. and THANK YOU !!!

    Hugs

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  20. Midway, i started making a list of foods to eat at 'graduation' time, or rather after the post chemo sickness. onion rings. shrimp cocktail, even a juicy cheese burger. (i don't eat meat). well, it been post chemo for 2 months now and i haven't eaten from the list. i think it was fun to see the list grow and that was what i needed at the time.

    'arting' was not available to me during treatment. creativity apparently was directed towards staying alive, coping, and accepting the emotions and aha's that came my way. as fatigue has lifted the pens pencils and paints have come out. i watch the page or canvas come to life with color and shape that is new to my eye. i don't use red this way. what's with these earth tones?? delicate lines. bold brazen passionate.

    who is this person coming to life?

    namaste

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  21. Tremendous and stupendous creation here. Wishing you well!!

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  22. Your marks are sacred and your words are filled with white healing light...the mandala is a spiritual being in itself. I have found a great deal of comfort in your words...Tomorrow as we celebrate a new Easter...may we all find peace. Imagine and Live in Peace, Mary Helen Fernandez Stewart

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  23. Karin,
    Your work is always so beautiful and the details.
    I hope your days become better and the pain is washed away.
    Take care.
    Katelen

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  24. Hi Gloria, thank you - I'm much improved :) hope you had a good easter weekend!

    Thanks Jay, and you are right, there's nothing better for me now, or ever, than getting to flex my creative muscles! thank you for the good wishes.

    Thank you Valerie, and a happy easter to you, too.

    I love that quote Bettina, and want you to know I feel you are one of my charming gardeners! With each day it becomes clearer who those special folks are in my life - thank you. love, K

    thank you lynne, xo

    thank you Jaliya - I did indeed get to enjoy a wee treat of chocolate, with a sweet little surprise easter basket from my sweetie!! and he also got our water fall flowing, so it's been a beautiful couple of days shifting into the warmer season - ahhh!

    Thank you kerryanne, it has been a lovely weekend - I hope you had the same.

    Thanks Robyn, I have to say I've been lucky in that I do have windows of feeling fairly good, tucked between the periods of 'this really sucks'! I take as full advantage of those good windows, and open them wide!!

    I believe I am taking care of myself Penny - though it is hard sometimes, wanting to do more then my energy allows! but I'm finding the right balance to allow for making a few marks along the way :) xo

    thanks Whitney, I am truckin' on!! xoxox

    thank you lyle, I am much improved :)

    ohh thank you Paige. xo

    thanks cat, pleased I am - and it's making me want to make more marks! it's true, universally, so much great art in all it's forms, are inspired by suffering/challenges, and the process is transforming, and healing. xxoo

    Well, thank you Linda Sue, though I don't think of myself as special at all. I truly believe I am simply doing what I need to do to put one foot in front of another, day to day, like so many incredible people faced with the wide range of daily challenges that living on this planet present, but thank you - I'll take the incredible, if you will, too!!

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  25. part 2, as I was so long winded with my replies I couldn't publish my comments!!

    Hi EM, yes, there is something different about this art process for me, and it does feel a bit like a channelling process. It doesn't work if I 'think', I must do it with an empty mind. I currently am having a great deal of trouble with my vision - one of those odd little side effects of chemo; Logically, it makes no sense that I could do such detailed, tiny markings, yet they are the 'easiest' thing for me to do in this blurry state. The reason being because I am following rather than directing the lines. I am grateful to know it reaches deeply within you and that you feel the healing aspects of it that I experience and feel as well. You are welcome, and thank you. ❤

    Hi Jasmine, the background print is from arabic newspaper. I love foreign print, too - I can leave behind content and move with the rhythm of shape and line - I love that! I am feeling much better today, thank you, xox

    Hi D, thank you for sharing your childhood memory - what a sweet one it is! I'm glad to have assisted in bringing it forward! much love, K

    Hi Laura, yes, our world wide support team is a phenomenon recently born that has brought new meaning to the lives of so many. We all are free to move through the world in such a magical way, even with our physical limitations! it's beautiful!! I am grateful for our meeting as well, xox

    thank you Maria, and you are quite welcome!! blessings to you, k

    Dear Peshe, first, congratulations making it through your chemo. I had to laugh with your food listing - I have taken pleasure in thinking about different foods as well - even watching cooking shows, with beautifully prepared foods I would never dream of eating (as a vegan) but somehow I feel a satisfaction in watching others enjoy thing I know I couldn't stomach. I have been fortunate - some days are actually good, and when a day like that comes my way, I eat well - though everything has that bitter metallic taste, I use my imagination and memory and experience food the best way I can. Kind of like those windows where my energy rises enough to pick up the pen...
    I am happy for you that you have been able to create again and are being introduced to new imagery, colors, lines - it sounds very exciting and life affirming! best to you in your continued healing and wellness...

    Many thanks Seth!

    Likewise Mary Helen, and may the celebration of easter bring energy and healing of renewal to us all. xo

    thank you Katelen, all is well :)
    and thanks to all who are reading these words and looking at my images, sending good thoughts, whether you leave a message here or not, I feel the presence of this collective - it's no wonder I am able to continue to create! You all help to empower me. xo

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  26. karin, i hope you are feeling better when you read this. i can see you are an inspiration to many, along the lines of our forever senior angel.

    i think it's interesting where your art and doodles are taking you. i am glad to be along for the ride. i'm super glad to get to know you.

    take care,

    love
    kj

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  27. Stunning work, Karin. You are an inspiration. Sending you magical wishes and healing vibes. Love & Light, dear one. xx

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  28. lynda howells4/5/10, 6:40 PM

    words fail me...amazingx reminded me of my time living in Dubai over 20 years agoxxlynda

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  29. Oh Karin! This is so marvellous, again I am blown away by your calligraphic hand!!

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  30. Karin, I hope you're feeling much improved today. Your mandala is just indescribably gorgeous, like your beautiful, strong soul. xxoo

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  31. Oh wow Karin! This is astonishing work! To think that with all your suffering you are still able to pull off something as incredibly detailed and as beautiful as this. Your ability to amaze knows no bounds. I've been so busy lately with the interview coming up, that I haven't had a chance to do many rounds on the blog circuit. I just wanted to come by and thank you for your encouraging and inspiring words on my blog. Thank you so much for taking the time to leave words of comfort.

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  32. Karin, the marks you are leaving are exquisite. I see your little journal drawings and your mandala, and I feel such power in them. I had to stop for a moment and say 'whoa' and really absorb what I was seeing. Really incredible imagery that I find so moving.

    I'm so sorry things have been rough. And I wish I could do something to take the pain away. I hope you kick cancer in the ass.

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  33. Words do not adequately translate timelessness, spacelessness and the indescribable feelings that express the essence of being. They are but a human mental filter that inteprets palpable inner knowing, unconditional love and acceptance. One feels his or her way through the truth. Love expresses messages through every sensation. Identify the blessing and perception transforms your experience again and again.

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