Saturday, October 10

October 9-10

It is now the day following the creation of the pages below, and my posting of these pages last night. What has become clear is that I will be needing to take a break from this creative process. I am carefully picking across the key board with my left hand, completely unable to move my right, which sits in my blanket covered lap wrapped in an ice pack.

The quote I share below, which inspired my desire to create and overrode my need for rest with another day of silence here, was heard in a conversation between Caroline Myss and Dr. Mona Lisa Schulz titled Where Medical Intuition Meets Mysticism.
I know I've said it before, but here I go again! Chronic pain is a very isolating experience. However, something new about it has been evolving within me. Something that knows there are periods of isolation that are more than okay, that they are what is called for. I believe I am entering into a deeper experience of that kind of time.

When there is a physical crisis, whether it happens to be due to illness, accident, trauma, or in my case all the above, the first thing we do, I did, is seek 'healing'. Look for a fix to the problem. I want to find out what is "wrong" with me, and have it taken care of. Truth be told, I've been on that treadmill off and on for over 20 years, because I've been experiencing chronic physical pain that has interfered with my day to day way of living since 1988.

Though these thoughts have been percolating within me for a while now, the conversation I listened to has clarified my thoughts, taking them further. The question being asked now is, what if all that searching outside of self is exactly the wrong thing to do? What if the process of seeking medical treatments, nutritional balance, holistic care, etc - what if all that is actually just taking me further away from the true "healing" that is needed? When you do everything right, try everything that all the experts, friends, family, and even strangers suggest, and all fail to bring relief, and even make you worse, doesn't that mean something?!

I know that all the seeking I've done, healing modalities I've worked with, inner journeying I've traveled - all the experiences that followed my searches have been necessary, and must have been done to get me where I am. However, an essential piece of the puzzle has been less attended to than the body/mind healing mantra.

There is a trilogy to healing, and I believe we are made up of equal parts, in this human form. Body, Mind, and Spirit, or Soul, or the Divine within - how ever you may address that third element. I think it often gets lumped into the attention of the Mind, but it lets us know when it is being unattended to. No amount of thinking, pondering, wondering, or even silence is enough for the healing of the soul. When dissatisfaction continues to mount, and the restlessness within churns and stirs, and the physical body sends it's own varied messages - well, I may be a slow learner, but I'm not stupid!

I've rambled on enough for now, the ice did it's trick and my hand is braced so I'm typing with two hands again. While I won't be able to create my work in they way that I have, I will have to find some way to express - it is a Soul need. How I do it will be the key.

Thank you, as always, for your care and divine support!

You're never around more light
than when in the dark night of the soul.
~ Caroline Myss

click on images for closer view


  1. Ah, I know this place... and that quote is kinda cool. I mean, the light, I interpret as awareness, knowledge... seeing things as they really are. And yeah, when in that darkest of dark places, its actually not very far to reach out and see. If only we can. Sometimes it takes a few trips to this wasteland before we have even our first glimpse of the light.

    Hope you're doing well xo

  2. Your art is so beautiful. Your quote fits well. Enjoy your week end.

  3. yesss...'Spiritual Madness' as she calls it.

    Your depiction is spot on...a moving self portrait.

    Travel well darlin'

  4. as always, beautiful work, Karin. I love the quote with it, you really captured the essence. I love it that her head is resting on the blue swirl... cloud? pillow of love? peace? gorgeous amico italiano!

  5. Sweet one the painting is magnificent.

    I don't even know what to say. I feel so angry. I am just angry that you are so hurt.

    I love you Karin and I guess that is what I am trying to say here. I love you.

    Love Renee xoxo

  6. nice thoughts - and so much truth is in both your words and pictures.
    our troubles can be our teachers, so they say. . . .

  7. Your work, as usual, is astonishing, deep, glorious! I too have pains, arthritic in hands and other places but the other places don't really count because they don't entertain me as much as my hands. When I can not felt or paint I reach for the glue...not to huff, though that might be a consideration...but to tear and paste in a not so exacting manner.Sometimes I am amazed at what establishes itself in that hap hazard way.The creativity always finds a way out!
    Really wonderful work, YOU!

  8. "The lowest ebb is the turn of the tide ... "

    Rest, dear heart ... rest.


  9. Always when I come here I am rewarded with light and peace, I thank you for being so honest in your struggle, and today especially for taking a moment to connect with me.

  10. I think you're amazing, Karin. Truly amazing.
    You mentioned finding a way to express yourself ...... perhaps Fiona's work could be a springboard to a new way of expressing your creativity.

  11. hi karin,
    have you heard of "macspeak"? i'm sure you have - maybe it could help type what you say so you can continue to post or continue/start your writing? i love this piece... it reminds me of a lily pad or lotus coming up from the mud. i saw one of thay's calligraphy pieces today and it said 'no mud, no lotus'... hope you can continue with something - even if john helps out?
    lots of love

  12. ps. i really love reading about your thoughts... your words are always poetic, even in the frustration - your soul is wise my friend...

  13. oh my .... back again to read the words that go with the images.
    I was thinking that when I learned that my auto immune thingy was INCURABLE, my immediate thought was that I had to go within to cure it. I just keep doing things that make my body feel good. I know that you will find the way that works for you too. I trust in that, because I know that you are a powerful creatress. xoxox cat

  14. HUGS my friend, I hope your journey leads where you will! I'm thinking of you and sending you tons of love, girlfriend!

    =) Liz

  15. This image touches me. I am writing a third draft of a script with dream images. This image reminds me of the war in my mind of the Red Dragon (Pain, fear and hate) and the Blue Dragon (Love, courage and Peace).

    The script is about an accident in a hospital when I was given a drug overdose and had a stroke. It felt like half my soul was gone.

    This is such wonderful art in showing the pull between pain and creativity. Thank you for sharing.

  16. for you, my friend, from hafiz...


    Without Brushing My Hair

    I get to you, Beloved
    The more I can see
    It is just You and I all alone
    In this

    I hear
    A knock at my door,
    Who else could it be,
    So I rush without brushing
    My hair.

    For too
    Many nights I have begged for Your

    And what
    Is the use of vanity
    At this late hour, at this divine season,
    That has now come to my folded

    If your love letters are true dear God
    I will surrender myself to
    Who you keep saying


    i have no words, except
    love and more love...


  17. Karin, Thank you so much for leaving such inspiring and encouraging comments on my blog. I've just read your latest post and how it resonates with me. Your artwork is fascinating and always full of meaning. I'm sending you bright wishes for good health and well-being. Much love, you bright and talented star. x

  18. Always powerful images and words Karin!

    My thoughts are with you!!

  19. Beautiful words and art together, you are such an inspiration. I pray that you will find a way to continue your creative expression and that your pain will not take away the beauty that you bring into this world.

    Take care and gentle hugs,

  20. It's the old Karmic Two-Step isn't it? This is what we've got, we choose how to live with it, how to transform it. Not that that is easy, got to walk the walk AND talk the talk. Yours in solidarity - whitney xxxxx

  21. Karin,
    My dear kind wonderful talented friend. Your words make me realize, that even as bad as I feal on days there are others out their pain and searching is much worse than I..My prayers are with you. As always your art touches my heart.

  22. The most important thing you can do for your art is to take care of yourself. Perhaps turning all your creative energy inward will provide the cure...Sadly it will mean withdrawal symptoms for those of us who look to your blog daily for inspiration and strength. I'm thinking you will soon come up with a way of expressing your creative spirit without causing pain to your physical being. I wish you 'Well', Karin.


  23. the image of vortexes leave me thinking and so does your very brave post.. both touch my soul and I hope you are feeling some relief today

  24. I dreamt of you last night. You were flying around the room.

    Love Renee xoxo

  25. You know that all of us who love you so much are crushed that you are hurting.

    Love Renee xoxo

  26. K, your intimate sharing is timeless, touching and part of a meaningful healig process. Thank you for inviting the world to awaken to deeper empathy, oneness and loving energy in profound ways. Everyone relates to everyone else. Everyone is a mirror of everyone else.

  27. That pitcher called "Two Snails Eating Miss Daisy."

  28. Have the winds calmed down dear one.


  29. Hi Svasti,yeah - that inner light of knowing that we always have access to, but sometimes cloud with 'stuff'! I believe that over a life time it takes very different things to send us to the wasteland - may even be what some of this living thing is all about - just how deeply into the waste are we willing to dig for treasure?!

    thank you Jasmine.

    hey D, and it was on a trip visiting you that I had my first intro to CMyss, at the Edgar Cayce institute book shop! how many years ago?!? yeesh :) xox

    More like a dizzying vortex Cat!! But one to be transformed into your vision, thank you! benedizioni, il mio amico

    Ahh, Renee, I love you too. Please gift me by releasing that anger out to be carried off by the autumn air, sending it away from your being... thank you my friend ❤

    Thank you Arty Em, yes, so very much to learn and expand from in these experiences of life.

    Hi dear Linda Sue, I'm thinking maybe tow painting, smearing with finger paint between my toes :) I have tried the tearing -but i can't grip with my thumbs right now. it will come out though - you are right! thank you, xo

    Yes Jaliya, but ♫ how low can we go, how low can we go ?!? sorry, couldn't resist :) xox

    thank you Deb, and you're welcome. wishing you healing relief as well.

    thanks Robyn, I had a similar thought after visiting your recent post - i felt so inspired and filled with wonder and awe by the natural beauty just in what is.

    Hey Jen, yes, I've hear of it, but as I do with all techno stuff, had resisted :) but the possibility is there, thank you! and yes, that lotus out of the mud imagery/metaphor has been resonating with me lately on a number of levels... xox

    mmm, incurable - bah! no such thing! So glad you have ways to make your bod feel good and trust in that going within, cat. for me, it's ever been evolving over these 20+ years, and that's why my focus to find what works is different moving forward - no more searching to find, within or outside since it's all part of me anywho! just observing what is, and what it's trying to tell me, if that makes sense...

    Thank you Liz!!

    Robert, I love the way you have labeled those elements, and the war that raged between them. Your story is a powerful one, and the reclaiming of your soul even more so! Thank YOU for your sharing. xo

    Thank you so much Lynne, This is a beautiful poem - and then the irony in it made me giggle, having no hair to brush. and there it is, the divine, the absurd, the struggle, the release, the joy, the sorrow, the living, the dying, the love, which I send, my friend.

    Many many thanks Carol Anne, xox
    and thank you Manon!

    Hi Jackie, thank you for your kind words and caring support, xox k

    yes, that is very true Whitney, commitment and follow through... xox

    Hi Katelen, or maybe I just express more vividly?! we can always find another in a better or worse place than our own - the most we can do is honor each and help to heal all. May your pain, in what ever it's form, weigh lighter today. sending love, k

    Hi Sonia, thank you for your 'well' wishes. yeah, my problem is sometimes I think taking care of myself has to include making art :) you are right, a way will come, and a healing will happen. xox

    thank you Peggy

    I really love that Renee - I never dream of flying, so to fly in your dream makes me very happy :) I love you xox

    thanks Patti

    Hi Liara, thank you for that reminder - sometimes I worry of revealing 'too much', but to remember it's all universal experience and universal healing is uniting, and worthwhile. xox K

    Hi Rondell, we can only see what we're open to seeing. much peace to you, k

    hey Renee, with less gusts, they still blow... xox

  30. Thank you dear friend.

    And what I admire about you. Well I don't have two lifetimes to tell you.

    Know that I hold you in my heart.

    Love Renee xoxo

  31. Karin,

    Thanks for your response. I definitely see two snails eating Miss Daisy in that pitcher. Like they say, to each his own, to each his own.

  32. Ah, beautiful Karin, I have been away and only read this post today. I feel a deep down compassion and love for you as you find ways to express your soul through the pain. The idea that your healing will stronger by turning inward resonates very deeply with me. I think your Soul is the expert in your being, and that brain needs some corraling by its more ethereal counterpart. I know you know this already with all the wonderful Soul work you do.
    I know one thing for sure - that enormous, glittering, rich and strong Soul of yours will not be quieted by its body or its mind. I see it glowing from here.
    Much love and gentle cool kisses on those hands.

  33. Hello and lovely to meet you too! Thank you so much for stopping on by and leaving such a lovely comment. Your work is beautiful and so wonderfully expressive. I am sorry you are in so much pain, all the time. That seems so unfair to me. It is crazy how our bodies can do that. I work with a girl who has muscular dystrophy and she doesn't sleep because of the pain (she is only 13 for crying out loud!). I wish I could take the pain away.

    Your artwork is far from painful; I hope it is cathartic for you and that you find what you are looking for through it.

  34. Hello Karin,
    You don't know me, but periodically I view your fact I added a link to your blog onto mine a while ago because I felt a kindred connection to your art.

    I understand what you must be feeling, on some level...of course our experiences as humans are often universal, but felt through our own unique perspectives...I too am a traveler on this path of discovery of what it means to heal. I was diagnosed with MS recently, but have been living with chronic pain and fatigue for 10 years. I label the planes of healing as four spaces...body, mind, heart and soul...but the concept is pretty much the same as yours. For now my body is taking her time in healing, but that does not mean the other facets of my being are lagging in their healing process.

    You are far from alone on this adventure...know that there are many of us walking/limping/wheeling beside you, compassionately encouraging you to continue your inner you seek balance and peace.


  35. Your beautiful words and art are so powerful... glowing with your own light... Roxanne

  36. Wow, Karin.

    I'm quite sure I have never seen such an outpouring of love and support in response to a blog before. It's overwhelming.

    I will coming back to you in the next couple of months to talk about illustrating my book, "Yoga Demystified--The Wonder of Being Alive". I have a book designer so you could focus entirely on the illustration.

    Think about this. It doesn't have to be all new work. Take a look at the text again at and think about how work you've already done might fit.

    Right now I've got a few other things to do on the site, like creating a downloadable pdf version so people don't have to click through all the pages. I can use this for those online book readers, too.

    But eventually I'm going to want to create a book, probably hardcover, with evocative artwork. I'm looking at other artists, too and I may run into others to consider. But so far yours is the only stuff that really excites me and seems to be a natural fit.

    Best wishes.

    Bob Weisenberg

  37. xox Renee

    You're welcome Rondell, and thanks for visiting. Art is certainly a very subjective thing, and can be approached from a number of 'angles'. Mine is created more with symbolism in mind, rather than literalism or realism. However if I were to apply a symbolic approach and meaning of your snails and overlay them onto this image, it would be in order to say that the spirals of the snail shell follow the path to looking; inward, the pace of the snail is slow, and it can be a slippery slimy trail along the way, while getting where we want to get. As for miss daisy being eaten, i'll leave that to your mind's eye.

    many thanks and much love for you and your big heartful soul Kim.

    thanks Deb- i enjoyed your post about our mutual friend patti very much!

    Hi Laura, thank you so much for your open heart felt message. yes, these experiences are shared and have universal elements that deeply connect us, i believe. my coping mechanism seems to be an unstoppable need to express it all! and in so doing, i find my kindreds. wishing you deep wellness and peace, karin

    thank you roxanne!!

    hi Bob,
    thanks so much - i know, i have the best blogging buds ever!! will chat more soon - and hopefully will be on the mend as well. peace, k


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