A Giving of Thanks

Grateful am I...

By feeling gratitude towards life,

I move towards light, wholeness, universal energy, love.

I move beyond the bounds of my own life and discover

that I am an expression or form of universal life,

of divine energy.

~ Arnaud Desjardins

click on images

for closer view

Above images were done with a new tool for me,

Derwent Inktense watercolor pencils.

Thank you Donna!!

and for mega doses of grateful messages

visit Shine the Divine, where Laura collected over 100

messages from friends and bloggers around the world,

to share with us all, spreading that divine shine!

looking outward and beyond...

As Thanksgiving approaches here in the United States, I think about the many advantages I have, just by living here.

I am fortunate in that I live in a beautiful home, eat well, and know that I can go out alone, doing so in relative safety. There is still progress to be made for women here in the work place, but we can work and have our independence. Women in the visual arts often have our talents overlooked by a still male dominated field - but I think that women in general have the potential for living fairly comfortable lives. I acknowledge that there are many individuals facing great challenges out there, especially in these economic times, and particularly single mothers - I don't want to diminish any one's experience, however I still believe we have access to more resources than many, in other parts of the world.

click on image for closer view

The following is one of those places,

and there are ways we can help,

so I thought I'd pass this along...

16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence

Day 1 - November 25, 2009
The Women of the Farchana Camp - The Survivors
Take Action: Read and Share the Farchana Manifesto

Day 2 - November 26, 2009
Zainab Salbi - The Entrepreneur
Take Action: Ribbon of Solidarity

Day 3 - November 27, 2009
Maria Bello - The Cause-lebrity
Take Action: Light a Candle

Day 4 - November 28, 2009
Dr. Mohammed Ahmed Abdallah - The Healer
Take Action: Letter of Support

Day 5 - November 29, 2009
Rev. Dr. Gloria White-Hammond - The Faith Leader
Take Action: Small Groups, Prayer Circles, Social Justice Boards and Sermons

Day 6 - November 30, 2009
Reporters Covering Violence Against Women in Sudan
Take Action: Letter to the Editor

Day 7 - December 1, 2009
Melanne Verveer - The Trailblazer
Take Action: “Women’s Rights are Human Rights” Social Media Outbreak

Day 8 - December 2, 2009
Rebecca Davis - The Dancer
Take Action: Creative Community

Day 9 - December 3, 2009
Refugees International - The Protectors
Take Action: Inform Yourself

Day 10 - December 4, 2009
Fatima Haroun - The Community Activist
Take Action: Community Events

Day 11 - December 5, 2009
Senators Barbara Boxer & Russ Feingold - The Policymakers
Take Action: Contact Your Senator

Day 12 - December 6, 2009
Nyaradzayi Gumbonzvanda and Swanee Hunt - The Mediators
Take Action: Read the Steinberg Testimony about Inclusive Peace

Day 13 - December 7, 2009
Halima Bashir - The One Who Shared Her Story
Take Action: Book Club & Discussion

Day 14 - December 8, 2009
Humanitarian and Civil Society Organizations Working on the Ground
Take Action: Contact Your Representative

Day 15 - December 9, 2009
Ann Curry - The Journalist
Take Action: Contact Your Networks

Day 16 - December 10, 2009
Zeinab Eyega - The Immigrant Advocate
Take Action: Connect with Diaspora Groups

this and that

I thought I'd update you on the postcard art benefit I did for Silvermine Guild, which you can reread here. The first two postcards shown on that link were sold, but six others were returned to me, and have found a place in my home! I joined the four parter into the frame above, which is clear glass sandwiched around the work, and shows the wall color behind.

The other two that remained I framed separately,

and I've grouped the with this collection, including a Nick Bantock,

and friend fab artist Gloria Santoyo Ruenitz

NOW...

I've got some sharing to do, for my fellow bloggers!

Many of you are familiar with Seth Apter's The Altered Page ,

but do you know about his Pulse Artist Survey Magazine?

From Seth:

The Pulse is coming. And it is beating loud and clear. So far over 175 artists have signed on to participate in the next edition of The Pulse, a survey in words and pictures of "the state of the art" of the online artist community. And it is not too late for you to join. If you are interested in being part of this project, email me and I will forward all of the information you need. Please contact me soon, as sign up for this project will end on November 30.

Well he is working on a new issue, and you can read all bout it here, and maybe you'd like to join in and share some of your artist's secrets, favorites, and indulgences!! It's quite a project, and reflects Seth's passions and commitment to art and all in blogland!

Parts of the shared discoveries will begin being revealed on

November 22, the first Secret Sundays...

"a series of weekly posts that offer a window

into the secrets of the participating artists"

Meanwhile, Laura Hegfield is Calling All Angels to join her in a Thanksgiving project of gratitude. If you'd like to share all that you are grateful for, stop on by her blog, Shine the Divine, to find out more, and open your grateful heart!

and I have been gifted with an award from Susan, over at Weaving A life, with a little award. Since things are a bit hectic over here and I haven't made some new art, I'll take advantage of this award, though I usually don't respond to them formally. Thank you Susan!!

I'm supposed to list seven things you don't know about me, which I am struggling to do - what kinda stuff should I share? would you want to know that I haven't put out there already?!

1~ I have worn glasses since I was in fourth grade. At night I liked to read and I'd fall asleep with those little John Lennon like frames on. When I woke up and got ready for school I couldn't find them anywhere. I cried and refused to go to school without my glasses. Finally they were found, deep and buried in my bed! I've remained very attached to my glasses and clear vision.

2~ I lost all my hair in 1999, or so, after 10 years of alopecia areata. So if I do need chemo, at least I won't go through that trauma, it's done and over with.

3~ As cliché as it is, I met my husband (who I just celebrated my 20th wedding anniversary with last Wednesday) at a bar above a restaurant I was eating at with a visiting friend. We'd gone upstairs after dinner for a drink and dancing (that's another subject) and he came over and talked to us - I thought his interest was with my friend - the master flirter, and I kind of sat back. Until she got bored and left us, because he obviously wasn't interested in her! I didn't believe anything he told me that night - that his name was John County, I'm like, yeah sure, and I'm Karin City, and that's Anne Township... to his saying he was practicing plastic surgery. That got the biggest laugh. Turned out it was all true, he was a surgical resident and was rotating through plastics that month. (He later left surgery and was certified in Pediatrics and Allergy/Immunology.)

3~ Dancing - I don't do it. When my parents wouldn't let me pursue water ballet, which I showed great potential for (heh) at the age of 6 (they had even been approached by a coach), they instead made me take regular ballet. I hated it - the dress up girly stuff was SO not me, and I swore that I would never dance again. Well, that "sacred contract" held hard and fast, because dancing was never something I enjoyed or did with free abandon. Anything in the water was another story! Years later I did learn to move again, during my dabbling with...

4~... a year of training to become an Expressive Arts Therapist. After a year I knew I couldn't work through art with an agenda though. It's a wonderful form of therapy, but I do art and learn through it without expectation - I don't use art as a tool for healing, art simply heals me. Trying to reverse the order, and go into it hoping to heal from what ever modality we engaged, took the magic out of it for me, so I know there were better people for practicing and mastering that approach.

5~ I also did two out of the three year training program in Medical Intuition offered by Caroline Myss and Norman Shealy, MD, at the Institute for the Science of Medical Intuition. Again, I realized this was not the path for me as a career, but I loved everything I learned and experienced in my own personal evolution.

6~ I helped create my kitchen with an eco friendly approach.

Our walls are covered with recycled brown craft paper, which I treated to create a stone like leathery appearance (We also used bamboo flooring, which you can see),

and we have concrete counters that I made a design pattern for, using contrasting concrete colored blocks and bands of aluminum.

7~ I have a fabulous friend, artist, teacher, inspiration visiting me here right now, timed perfectly for helping me transition through the door of cancer patient. Donna Iona Drozda from Drozda's Art Life has been a friend for twenty some years and couldn't be a better boost to my spirit! We've been laughing a whole lot :)

November 14-15

click on images for closer view

___________

Friday the 13th

This is an image from an old journal, but seems fitting...

The news I received today wasn't what I hoped for,

but could certainly be whole lot worse.

I am very fortunate that my doctor ordered an ultrasound

to go along with my mammogram, because had I relied solely

on the mammogram results, I would be thinking all was normal.

The ultrasound revealed what the mammogram imaging did not,

that I had a lump. The biopsy has revealed that the lump is

'minimally invasive ductal carcinoma'.

Cancer.

Actually, the image above is how I think I should feel,

but really I'm kind of numb.

I keep expecting to feel scared, sad, upset - but I don't.

I know I need to simply keep moving forward, take the steps

required to remove the cancer, and heal.

I didn't get the news until it was too late for me to reach

the breast specialist who did my previous (non-cancerous) lumpectomy,

so all will have to wait until Monday...

so on I go, trusting

all is well, always

all is well, always,

all is well, always,

all is well, always...

November 12

click on images for closer view

I finished these pages just before I left to have my biopsy today.

I will get results tomorrow,
along with word about hand surgery.

Until then I'm keeping good thoughts,

and know you all are as well,
so thank you!

at home

"It never occurred to me to leave home to make art."

~ Sally Mann

The quote above comes from a dvd that Lynne Hoppe lent me a few months ago titled What Remains: The Life and Work of Sally Mann.

(here's a clip where these words are spoken)

That phrase struck me as true for myself and my work as well. I know many artists feel the need and desire to travel far and wide, and I used to wonder why I've never had that longing. I love being inspired by the simple things that pass before me.

We've been having a period of Indian summer which has been so nice. Opening the windows to let air in, knowing soon it will be too cold. I wandered around my yard appreciating the breeze, sunshine and beauty around me - feeling inspired by the textures, colors, and minute details longing to be observed, or so it felt.

I went back inside and got my camera, and all the pics you see are some of the things I saw...

check out the cute slug in these two :)

When I came back in, I went into my studio briefly.

From outside my window I heard a skirmish of some sort,

so I went to the window and looked down onto our patio.

I startled the startler - a beautiful red tailed hawk had landed,

probably on the hunt for one of the many critters that visit our bird feeders,

but he took off with empty claws, and flew right by my window!

It was so quick, but so amazing.

Nope, it never occurs to me to leave home to be inspired!

...November 5-6

It's been an especially long week,

and I've really been missing my journal, creating, and interacting with all of you,

but I've had to listen to my body and it's been loud and clear.

I don't feel able to visually depict the layers

of what I'm experiencing quite the way I want to,

but what I have done starts with the obvious,

words describing the glaring, the blaring;

moving on to color, movement, image;

then to where I used dimension but simplicity,

focus and direction.

That's what I was going for anyway,

but I'm not able to do it quite in the way I would,

if I could,

so this is what I ended up with earlier today.

One of the things I've been asking myself to think about,

through some of the reading I've been doing,

is what kinds of mixed messages do I give myself.

In general I am a pretty positive person, and I can always find a way to turn things around and find that 'silver lining'. On the other hand, I am guilty of delivering harsh blows to myself, with my own thoughts, especially when I get feeling overwhelmed, hurt, or tired. So I'm trying to be aware of when those thoughts happen, what triggers them, and how I can turn them around - because if my body is to heal, it needs full throttle self love, which I've discovered is the hardest thing I will probably ever learn to do.

Give my own self, unconditional love.

I know most of the reasons, and perhaps I'll share some of those some day, but dang if that isn't the most ridiculous thing that we humans struggle with - we can adore our children, our friends, our pets - heck, I do a better job loving a pepper plant some days!

I've never been all that comfortable with prayer, in any formal sense of the word. I am also working on that - finding a few words that I can hold close, repeat and truly believe the message of, that I can offer up. I believe that prayers, offerings, words of deliverance can heal, but not if they are scattered in with mixed messages that cause self sabotage, so here's to clear thoughts, and "seeking grace". If you have a special prayer, mantra, or healing poem that you say to yourself, and are willing to share it, I'd love for you to leave it for us all to read.

I wasn't planning on sharing this yet, but if I'm going to put full faith in the power of thought and prayer, I'm going to leave you by asking for your prayers. Not coincidently, it seems (considering all I've been thinking about of late, and how I put myself to the test through my body when I take on new challenges) after I finished these pages earlier today, I had to go for my annual breast exam. The mammogram came back looking good, but because of my history, I also had an ultrasound, which found a well defined lump. I'm thinking whew - what if I never had a lump before, I'd have gone merrily on my way, with a clean bill via the mammo, which it still may be, but I feel lucky I had the ultrasound... I will have a needle biopsy done next Thursday, and should have the results by a week from today. In the mean time I'm not worrying, because that's just not what I do. It seems like such a waste, since there's nothing I can do between now and when I get more information. Gathering up good energy I can do, so I'm ready to harvest :)

I will keep you posted, and thank you in advance for all I know you will send my way. Love, Karin